Putting Aside Tradition for a Better Education Experience

Mary Jean-Le Tendre with the U.S. Department of Education once said, “America’s future walks through the doors of our schools every day”. Why then are parents and educators complacent with the current learning conditions in our public school system? Once upon a time, children were taught all together in a one-room school house. The older children taught the younger children, and the older children learned responsibility through helping with the younger children. While not perfect, one-room schoolhouses had something that the current public school system does not have; smaller classes and broader learning experiences. Although the traditional public school system is an established system in the Fairbanks North Star Borough, the Fairbanks North Star Borough School District should transition all K-8 schools into magnet schools because many children become lost academically in the current system, magnet schools provide a nurturing environment that add balance through both the academics and the arts, and magnet schools focus on each individual student and their learning style to provide the best learning experience for that child.

Many parents today opt for small private schools and home schooling over public schools because of the extra attention they know their child will receive. Education is worth the money especially later on down the road when a child is then applying for colleges. Public schools tend to use a proverbial cookie cutter when looking at students in the system. Bright students with no other problems will always succeed but the other children who might be just as bright but have some behavioral issues will be pushed to the side. I will use for example my four children. I have two boys and two girls. All four children are equally bright. The two girls excel at everything from the arts to math and even science. They are well-rounded individuals who will succeed with no doubt. In fact the older one has been given a choice of quite a few colleges with full scholarship. The two boys are also very smart. Both have a problem sitting still and paying attention. They do not have Attention Deficit Disorder so they do not qualify for special programs the public school system offers. The older boy is now graduated, but it was a struggle for him all the way to the end. He only had a select few teachers out of the many that understood his needs and worked with him. He is still successful though having joined the military as a police officer and doing what he really loves. My younger son is the same way. Lucky for him, he was accepted into Barnette Magnet School where the teachers have the time to work with him on an individual basis.

Magnet schools have been in effect since the 1960’s. Usually a magnet school will choose the arts or science as the main focus of their school. The magnet school in Fairbanks, Barnette Magnet School, focuses on science. The schools were originally intended to draw out bright students from the regular public schools in order to facilitate the student’s needs and give them something extra. Today’s magnet schools do operate somewhat the same way, but many times students are not just accepted based on their academic skills any more. There are different ways to get into a magnet school. The school in Fairbanks accepts students by lottery every year. In the lower 48, students may be accepted according to their district with a few slots on reserve for other students. Why magnet school over regular public school? Magnet schools offer multi-age classrooms for the children to learn from each other. They also offer smaller classrooms which gives the teacher more time with each individual student. Barnette Magnet School “loops” their teachers so the children will have the same teacher at least two years in a row. The current set up at Barnette has the children in their core classroom for the morning session where the teacher teaches the basics of math and literature and writing to the students. For this portion, they are all in the same grade. After lunch, the children branch off into “exploration classes” that the student and parent chose at the end of the previous school year. These explorations range from art, science, music, history, and physical education. The school’s set up is for the success of the student. Every teacher has the child’s best interest at heart and goes above and beyond for their students. In the magnet school, there is more parent and teacher interaction as well.

The “No Child Left Behind Act” has put pressure on public schools to work with the children in raising their grades. More should be done though. There are many children out in the community that are bright and would succeed but either do not fit in the cookie cutter shape the school district expects them to be in or it is the lack of parental participation at home. Transitioning all the K-8 grade schools into magnets school would make an immense difference in the community and provide greater opportunities for students. If each elementary and middle school where to become magnet schools, there would be room for each child currently attending school. The magnet school would accept children by district with a few slots for children who would like to choose a different school. Bus routes would not be disrupted because children would stay within their district. One other benefit of transitioning to magnet schools would be the easier transition into high school. Students would be used to having more than one teacher, which would ease part of the stress of being a freshman. One concern might be the question of what type of magnet school each one would be. Currently the University of Alaska is a science-based university because of the scientific research opportunities available in Alaska. I feel that the public school system could follow in the footsteps of the University of Alaska Fairbanks and keep the science theme alive throughout the school district as well.

No school system is ever perfect because of our ever-changing society. However, changing our current public schools into magnet schools would give each child a better opportunity for a brighter future. Each child could have a better learning experience based on their needs and would be able to learn in an environment that current public schools are unable to provide. Educators should remember that children do not learn on the same level and many children are left out of the current system because they are not understood. Magnet schools will provide all children the same opportunity to learn and have fun at the same time. School should not be a source of frustration for children, but should be a great adventure. Magnet schools have the flexibility to provide those learning adventures.

Workshop of Mallory's 2nd Rough Draft

Workshop of Mallory's 2nd Rough Draft

Rough Draft #2 Workshop Questions

(Questions are the same as for Draft #1)

Overall
1. What do you like best about the paper? The topic. Coral Reefs are a fascinating topic to talk about.
2. Email the author and ask for one particular concern that s/he had about the draft. Examine that area and see if you can offer the author helpful suggestions.

Mallory is concerned that her essay skips around and doesn’t follow the thesis logically. After reading the essay, I would have to disagree. I thought the essay followed the thesis very well. One suggestion I would make would be to just add in some transitional sentences that link one paragraph to the next and that should help with any choppiness you feel is there.

Thesis
3. Does the author clearly express his/her opinion of the topic in the thesis? What argument does the thesis make? Yes, the author is against commercial fishing because it destroys coral reefs
4. What group of people agrees with the author? What group disagrees with the author? Conservationists will agree with the author and the commercial fisheries will disagree
5. Does the paper have an argumentative thesis statement using ALTHOUGH and BECAUSE? Yes it does

Content
6. On a scale of 1 to 10, how interesting did you find this paper to read? Be brutally honest! (Friends don’t let friend turn in boring essays!) the paper was a 6…I had a little bit of a hard time reading it because there were grammatical errors throughout the paper
7.Where can the author more fully develop ideas, either by providing examples or explaining/clarifying concepts for the reader? Be specific (e.g. “the 3rd is dullsville”; “the conclusion is really vague”).I actually thought that everything was clear and the ideas were developed nicely.
8.What kinds of objections might someone who disagrees with the author’s point of view raise? Commercial fishing is not the only thing destroying the reefs….What about natural phenomenons such as El Ninos?
9.Has the author dealt with these objections? Not that I could see
10.Is the relationship between each paragraph and the thesis clear? If not, what suggestions do you have for the author to improve the connection? I thought that it flowed well from one paragraph to the next and I could see the relation between the paragraphs and the thesis statement.

Style
11. Are there easy transitions from one paragraph to the next, or does the author jump from topic to topic? There were good transitions and no jumping around.
12. Does the opening of the essay capture the reader’s attention? How so? If not, what suggestions can you make that might strengthen the opening? Yes, AIDS is definitely a word that will capture the reader’ attention
13. Does the concluding paragraph serve to bring the discussion to an end that logically follows from the thesis and its direction? The concluding paragraph summed up what her opinion was on the subject. I thought that it ended the essay nicely.

Research
14. How many different sources are cited in the paper (don’t look at Works Cited or References (depending if it's MLA or APA); look at the parenthetical citations. The medium does not matter.) I counted 15
15. Does the author rely heavily on just 1 or 2 sources, or does the author equally use all of the sources to support the paper’s thesis? A couple of sources were used 2-3 times but overall I think that it was equal.
16. Does the author have more quotes in his/her paper than personal opinion? No I don’t think so. I wasn’t sure about the paraphrased with the quote behind it though. I saw that several times.
17. Are there any sources listed on the Works Cited or References that are not cited within the body of the essay? (This is a no-no) no, but Kirkwood and Weiner were not on the work cited list
18. Is all the information retrieved from research, including opinion, ideas, paraphrases, quotes, and statistics, cited with in-text (parenthetical) citations? If not, list specifics of what needs to be cited (friends don’t let friends turn in plagiarized papers). It looked like everything was cited to me.
19. All quotes in research papers should be commented upon. Does the author comment after every quote? If not, help the author decide what the underlying reason behind putting the quote in the paper was. There was more paraphrasing than quotes in the paper. I would take a look at the quotes and make sure that they were not already paraphrased.

Research Paper 2nd Rough Draft

Imagine the scene in “Waterworld” where Kevin Costner’s character urinates in a contraption that then distills the water. He pours the water into a plant, which then provides drinkable water for him. Sure, there was a collective “Ewwww!” worldwide during that scene because of the gross factor; but was that idea so far fetched? Everyday, water is wasted through baths, showers, doing the dishes and flushing the toilet. But what if that water could be treated and reused? In the world, there is about one percent of water available for drinking. (Integrated Water Strategies, 2007) That same water is not just used for drinking; it is also used for all household functions. Recycling water is not new in nature, but has come to the forefront again as countries are re-evaluating their water needs. While some countries already participate in water recycling, other countries are unsure about trying it because the thought of drinking wastewater is unappealing. “Wastewater has been treated to a level that is fit for drinking, consumers, especially the public, do not have a complete understanding of the treatment techniques for reusing waste water and find these ‘toilet to tap’ projects unacceptable.” (San Jose, 2007) Unfortunately the environment is in a tailspin towards global warming, so every effort should be made towards recycling. Although initially expensive to create and still somewhat controversial, water treatment facilities are important because they recycle already used water, save millions of gallons each day, and protect the environment from further harm.

There are at least two different types of treatment facilities. In the most common type of facility, the wastewater goes through a series of vats in the chemical process until at last it comes out clean. The water is tested before being sent out for reuse. The more the water is going to come into contact with a person, the more chemically treated it is to prevent sickness and disease from affecting any individual. A newer type of treatment facility is a man made “natural wetland”. Gravel and rock are put down with dirt. The wastewater is placed on top and plants that are chosen because they help out the environment are planted. As the soil begins to break down, water trickles into pipes laid in the ground. The plants help by breaking down the waste quicker through sunlight and the natural oxygen they produce. Integrated Water Systems in North Carolina uses the natural technique when creating their water treatment facilities. They say that their facilities are “designed for nature by nature”. (Integrated water strategies, 2007) This means that they have designed their systems around nature’s model. The chemical process is the most popular process to use, but people are starting to realize that recycling naturally is not only better for the environment but it is the natural process. The earth already recycles water naturally, so we should as well. Both of these water treatment processes only send out water to be used for watering lawns, washing cars, and anything else that could use non-potable water. This treated water is not used for drinking water. Besides those two major treatment facilities, there are now at home water treatment units that can be installed to recycle what is called “grey water”. According to Grey Water Central, grey water is washing machine, dishwasher, and shower water. Pipes can be re-routed to go to this unit so that the water can be treated and reused. (Grey Water Central, 2007) One example of grey water reuse is the Melbourne Linen Services in Australia. This linen company was given a grant to pay for their AquaRecycle Laundry Water Recycling System. Water that the launderer uses will be sent through this system to recycle over 80 percent of their water usage. According to the Ecos article, “Melbourne Linen Services…will reduce its potable water consumption by approximately 50 million liters per year – an 80 percent decrease”. (Ecos, 2007) Using grey water in businesses such as launderers is very cost effective considering the amount of water used per day.

“Going Green”, which seems to be the new slogan for saving the environment, includes water recycling as well. It is pricey at first but worth the efforts that pay off in the future. According to Gary Christensen who is the owner of the Banner Bank building in Boise, “The deeper you go into green design, the more you find cost savings to offset the higher expense.” (Gunther, 2007) And his building isn’t the only one to go green. Many other major corporations such as Bank of America are using grey water as part of their green endeavors. People are definitely becoming more conscience of the fact that we should be recycling our water. According an article in Industry News, by 2010, water recycling in the United States will have increased by 11.1 percent. They also say “the growth rate reflects the fact that significant innovation is still occurring, making technologies more accessible to a greater number of potential buyers.” (Pollution Engineering, 2007) This means that water recycling has greatly come down in price so that more people and not just businesses can afford to recycle. According to an article in Australian Geographic, the financial benefits of water recycling are really good in some of the areas in Australia. For personal use, small diversion systems run $40 to $200 and more extensive systems range from $6,000 to $10,000. The smaller systems allow for the water to be used on lawn and flowers outside while the larger systems allow for the water to be used to flush the toilets inside the home. There is also the expense of having a plumber re-route the system for the home. This can be up to an additional $1500. While this might seem like a large cost up front, this article estimates that the people would save about 30 percent of their water usage. (McGhee, 2007) For those who pay for water, 30 percent is a huge savings. The initial cost of the equipment would be offset by the savings on their monthly bill.

With an ongoing drought in several countries including America, the idea of saving water is becoming more attractive not only to residents but also to lawmakers and politicians. Right now Denver, Colorado is struggling to integrate a new system in which to recycle wastewater. The price tag for a new system is right around one billion dollars, however, they expect to welcome another three million people into the state within the next five years. In order to meet future water needs, they need to make a decision now regarding their water use. With installing a new system, they hope to double the amount of treated water they currently use.(Rocky Mountain News, 2007) Cheyenne, Wyoming uses their treated water to water the parks. They estimate that they save over one million gallons of water each day by using treated water. (Local News 8, 2007) Australia is at the forefront of the debate right now as two cities fight over whether they really want to drink recycled water. The politicians are ready to implement the 68 million dollar facility to treat the water but residents are not ready yet. They are unsure about the idea of drinking purified wastewater or as science.org put it, “thinking that the water in the glass in your hand might have started off in someone’s toilet bowl”. (Nova – Science.org.au, 2007) The idea of drinking water coming from the toilet bowl does sound unappealing; but with the proper treatment and chemicals, any water can be safe for consumption. San Jose, California is already looking ahead to the future by thinking of recycling sewer water into drinking water. While recycling sewer water is still a future dream, they are working on a recycling center to open in November to recycle all other wastewater. “The Orange County Water District will inaugurate in November a plant that will recycle up to 70 million gallons of waste water a day.” (San Jose, 2007) Georgia is the state that is making the news lately. According to the Tampa Tribune, “Lake Lanier in North Georgia supplies drinking water for metro Atlanta’s 4 million residents”. (Salinero, 2007) Lake Lanier is way below normal levels and although the Army Corp of engineers says that there is no emergency, the governor says there is. He is fighting with the state of Florida and the state of Alabama to stop water drainage to their states in hopes of preserving the water for Georgia. The water drainage from the lake helps many things such as endangered species or the seafood industry in Florida. (Salinero, 2007) Many of the counties are now under very strict water rations and there is speculation that the lake only has about three months of water left for consumption. One of the reasons why Georgia is hurting so badly is because they never put a water conservation plan into place. Now that the worst has happened, there is a struggle to scramble and find a way to quickly conserve what should have been taken care of a long time ago. (Bluestein, 2007) If Georgia would put into place a good water recycling system, they would not be in the mess they are in right now. They would not be struggling with water rations and fines against people who use too much of their water. All is not lost in Georgia though. According to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, the Sandy Springs area will be including recycling requirements for grey water recycling systems in many of the new homes in an effort to begin conserving water if approved by the City Council. (MacDonald, 2007) By making it a requirement to place grey water systems in all new homes, the water savings would be tremendous not only for the Atlanta area but also for other areas that might adopt the same policy.

When thinking of recycling, one does not readily think of water conservation. In fact, it would probably be last on the list with paper, glass, and aluminum first. (Water Recycling, 2007) However, water is very important to a healthy environment and planet. Without water, our planet cannot survive. It is important to put up with the expense of saving water now, than spending more in the future trying to save what was lost. We should quit being selfish and start thinking about our children and even grandchildren’s future. What legacy are we leaving them? Are we leaving them a beautiful environment or a desert wasteland? There are so many different environmental benefits in water recycling such as giving an additional source of water with out depleting what little we have left, it helps our ecosystem and keeps balance, it also helps prevent pollution. (Water Recycling, 2007) With so many benefits to water recycling, more people should get on board and do their part to recycle. Even saving the smallest drop of water is huge and could ultimately be the drop that saves the planet.

With only approximately one percent of water available for consumption on the earth, measures should be taken to protect our environment. (Integrated Water Strategies, 2007) With global warming as a huge threat in the future and our water supply slowly dwindling as glaciers continue to melt at an ever-quickening pace; we need to turn towards water recycling as a means for protecting not only the environment but our water supplies as well. The rapid decline of glaciers and drying riverbeds should be a clue and a wake up call that global warming is here and water recycling will keep the global warming at bay. According to an article in the Wall Street Journal, “Mr. Roberts estimates that 1.1 Billion people world-wide lack access to clean drinking water.” (Batson, 2007) With water recycling resources available, there should be no problem providing fresh water to anyone needing it. Using treated recycled water is a great way to save the environment and help the earth last a little longer.

References

Batson, A. (2007) Coke aims to improve water recycling; proposal marks a bid to address criticism in developing nations. Wall Street Journal. Retrieved on October 24, 2007 from Ebsco Host

Bluestein, G. (2007) Georgia has no plan for drought. Associated Press. Retrieved from http://www.decaturdaily.com/decaturdaily/news/071029/drought.shtml on October 31, 2007

Clayton, S. (2007). Desalination: OPTION OR DISTRACTION? Ecos. 138, 33. Retrieved on October 11, 2007 from Ebsco Host.

Pollution Engineering. 38, 8. Don't throw out the bath water. (2006). Retrieved on November 21, 2007 from Ebsco Host.

Grey Water Central (2007) Retrieved October 11, 2007 from http://www.oasisdesign.net

Gunther, M. (2007). Who's the greenest bank of all? Fortune. 156,32. Retrieved on November 21, 2007 from Ebsco Host.

Integrated Water Strategies (2007) Retrieved October 11, 2007 from http://waterrecycling.com

Kruszelnicki, K. (2006) Water Recycling. Great Moments in Science. Retrieved from http://www.abc.net.au on September 26, 2007.

McGhee, K. (2007). Brighter shade of grey. Australian Geographic. 85, 130-137. Retrieved on November 21, 2007 from Ebsco Host.

Membrane Technology. (2007) Rising demand for fresh water drives recycling systems market. Retrieved on October 19, 2007 from Ebsco Host.

Salinero, M. (2007) Georgia’s answer to drought riles neighboring governors. The Tampa Tribune. Retrieved from http://www2.tbo.com/content/2007/nov/01/na-georgias-answer-to-drought-riles-neighboring-go/?news-nationworld on October 31, 2007.

San Jose looks to turning sewage water into drinking water. News Fuze. Retrieved from http://www.mercurynews.com on September 26, 2007.

Scott, J. (2007) Increase in Peninsula Bills Expected. Water Ways. Retrieved from http:// www.insidebayarea.com on September 26, 2007.

Smith, J. (2007) Sticker shock: $1 billion for water. Rocky Mountain News. Retrieved from http://www.rockymountainnews.com on September 26, 2007.

Water Recycling in Cheyenne Saves 1 Million Gallons a Day. Associated Press. Retrieved from http://www.localnews8.com on September 26, 2007.

Water Recycling and Reuse: The Environmental Benefits, Region 9: Water Program (2007) Retrieved September 36, 2007 from www.epa.gov

MacDonald, M. (2007). Sandy Springs delays cote on building code changes. The Atlanta Journal-Constitution. Retrieved on the web November 21, 2007 from www.ajc.com/ metro/content/metro/northfulton/stories/ 2007/ 1120 /sandybrief _ 1121_web.html

Workshop of Trista's Solution Paper

Solution Essay Workshop Questions for Trista's paper
Thesis:
1. Restate the thesis in your own words. If the thesis is a question and not an assertion, make it an assertion. Make sure the words “although” and "because" are in it.

Although dumpster diving is dangerous, it should not be illegal because people make money off of it and people don’t look through the recycling stations.

2. Does the thesis state the author's position on a controversial topic? Is it at the end of the first paragraph? Yes and Yes

Reasons:
List below the author's reasons for holding his or her position. Are they listed in the thesis, or in the body of the paper? They should be listed in the thesis, and expanded upon in the body of the paper.

1. many people make a living by salvaging out of dumpsters

2. not everyone utilizes the 'recycling' station.

3.

Audience:
Who is the author's audience? Do they already agree with the author, or is the author writing to the opposition? How can you tell? Give specific examples. The author’s audience is everyone in the Fairbanks North Star Borough. The author is writing to the opposition because there are more people against dumpster diving than for it.

Counterargument:
List the counterarguments (arguments of the author’s oppositions) used in the paper (there should be at least three). Does the author adequately address these arguments? Do you think there are other arguments that could be addressed? Do you see any logical fallacies?

1. Dumpster diving is dangerous – was in the intro but not covered in the body

2. Ethics of going through other people’s trash – not covered well enough

3. can’t think of another

Title:
Does the paper have an interesting title? If not, help author come up with one.

“Dive At Your Own Risk!”

Introduction:
Is there a catchy lead sentence? What is it? If there isn't one, what would you suggest?
I think the lead sentence is fine. It definitely caught my attention.
Conclusion:
How does the author conclude the paper? What do you think of it? I think that the conclusion is ok. It concludes the author’s point of view.

Flow/Transitions:
Does each paragraph expand upon the thesis? Do the paragraphs flow? Which paragraphs have bumpy transitions?

In the intro try this: But more importantly, it is part of our Fairbanks heritage; and it’s come under fire recently. Although dumpster diving is potentially dangerous, the Borough Assembly should not criminalize it, because many people make a living by salvaging out of dumpsters, and not everyone utilizes the 'recycling' station.

There also should be a transition sentence before “Not if Assemblyman Charlie Rex has anything to do with it.”, in the second paragraph.

Workshop of Trista's Research Paper

Workshop of Trista's Paper

Rough Draft #1 Workshop Questions
Overall
1. What do you like best about the paper? Be specific.

I liked the paragraph about the Florida Keys and the manatees which happen to be one of my favorite animals

2. Email the author and ask for one particular concern that s/he had about the draft. Examine that area and see if you can offer the author helpful suggestions.

Waiting on Response Although she did write at the bottom of her paper that it needed to be longer and she needed to cite her sources. I would say that those are her main concerns.

Thesis
3. Does the author clearly express his/her opinion of the topic in the thesis? What argument does the thesis make?

Yes. The argument is that eutrophication is a serious global problem and it alters the environment.

4. What group of people agrees with the author? What group disagrees with the author?

Environmental people will love this paper because it argues on their side.

Those that use chemicals of any kind will be against the paper because chemicals are causing the problems.

5. Does the paper have an argumentative thesis statement using ALTHOUGH and BECAUSE?

Yes

Content
6. On a scale of 1 to 10, how interesting did you find this paper to read? Be brutally honest! (Friends don’t let friend turn in boring essays!)

Probably a 1 or 2.

7.Where can the author more fully develop ideas, either by providing examples or explaining/clarifying concepts for the reader? Be specific (e.g. “the 3rd is dullsville”; “the conclusion is really vague”). The intro needs a story or something empathetic…like the plight of the sea turtles or manatees to draw the reader in. I’m not sure that there was a conclusion either. The last paragraph talks about educating people and then stops there. I didn’t feel that the paper was wrapped up at all. I would love to see more stories or examples through out the paper; this would break up some of the long words and technical terms which would make it an easier read.

8.What kinds of objections might someone who disagrees with the author’s point of view raise? If there are none, go back to #3.

I think one of the main objections will be from the factories and farmers that use chemicals. They will say that the changes sited would have happened any way despite evidence that the changes have resulted from chemicals.

9.Has the author dealt with these objections? She gives the guidelines of what the EPA uses to pinpoint pollutant problems so I think so.

10.Is the relationship between each paragraph and the thesis clear? If not, what suggestions do you have for the author to improve the connection?
I’m not sure if the blogger made all the paragraph breaks, but I think that there are too many paragraphs. They make the essay look short and choppy. I can’t really tell if the paper follows the thesis so I would make this suggestion… Intro with thesis, paragraph explaining in detail what eutrophication is, paragraph talking about the alteration of wetlands, paragraph about fisheries collapses, paragraph about watershed contamination, conclusion that wraps up the entire thesis and global warming effects. Some transitions between paragraphs would help smooth it out as well.

Style
11. Are there easy transitions from one paragraph to the next, or does the author jump from topic to topic?

It needs transitions because right now the author jumps from topic to topic.

12. Does the opening of the essay capture the reader’s attention? How so? If not, what suggestions can you make that might strengthen the opening? The intro needs a story or something empathetic…like the plight of the sea turtles or manatees to draw the reader in.

13. Does the concluding paragraph serve to bring the discussion to an end that logically follows from the thesis and its direction? The last paragraph talks about educating people and then stops there. I didn’t feel that the paper was wrapped up at all. The conclusion did not wrap up the thesis.

Research
14. How many different sources are cited in the paper (don’t look at Works Cited or References (depending if it's MLA or APA); look at the parenthetical citations. The medium does not matter.) I’m pretty sure I counted four

15. Does the author rely heavily on just 1 or 2 sources, or does the author equally use all of the sources to support the paper’s thesis? I think the few that were sited were equal

16. Does the author have more quotes in his/her paper than personal opinion? There are no quotes in the paper.

17. Are there any sources listed on the Works Cited or References that are not cited within the body of the essay? (This is a no-no) Yes they do

18. Is all the information retrieved from research, including opinion, ideas, paraphrases, quotes, and statistics, cited with in-text (parenthetical) citations? If not, list specifics of what needs to be cited (friends don’t let friends turn in plagiarized papers). There was very little cited in the paper so I wondered where most of the information came from such as the example of the Florida Keys or the fishery in Japan.
19. All quotes in research papers should be commented upon. Does the author comment after every quote? If not, help the author decide what the underlying reason behind putting the quote in the paper was. There were no quotes, only paraphrasing.

Solution Paper - First Draft - Magnet Schools

Mary Jean-Le Tendre once said, “America’s future walks through the doors of our schools every day”. Why then are parents and educators complacent with the current learning conditions in our public school system? Once upon a time, children were taught all together in a one room school house. The younger children were taught by the older children, and the older children learned responsibility through helping with the younger children. While not perfect, one room school houses had something that the current public school system does not have; smaller classes and broader learning experiences. Although the traditional public school system is an established system in the Fairbanks North Star Borough, the Fairbanks North Star Borough School District should transition all K-8 schools into magnet schools because many children become lost academically in the current system, magnet schools provide a nurturing environment that add balance through both the academics and the arts, and magnet schools focus on each individual student and their learning style to provide the best learning experience for that child.

Many parents today opt for small private schools and home schooling over public schools because of the extra attention they know their child will receive. Education is worth the money especially later on down the road when a child is then applying for colleges. Public schools tend to use a proverbial cookie cutter when looking at students in the system. Bright students with no other problems will always succeed but the other children who might be just as bright but have some behavioral issues will be pushed to the side. I will use for example my four children. I have two boys and two girls. All four children are equally bright. The two girls excel at everything from the arts to math and even science. They are well rounded individuals who will succeed with no doubt. In fact the older one has been given a choice of quite a few colleges with full scholarship. The two boys are also very smart. Both have a problem sitting still and paying attention. They do not have Attention Deficit Disorder so they do not qualify for special programs the public school system offers. The older boy is now graduated, but it was a struggle for him all the way to the end. He only had a select few teachers out of the many that understood his needs and worked with him. He is still successful though having joined the military as a police officer and doing what he really loves. My younger son is the same way. Lucky for him, he was accepted into Barnette Magnet School where the teachers have the time to work with him on an individual basis.

Magnet schools have been in effect since the 1960’s. Usually a magnet school will choose the arts or science as the main focus of their school. The magnet school in Fairbanks, Barnette Magnet School, focuses on science. The schools were originally intended to draw out bright students from the regular public schools in order to facilitate the student’s needs and give them something extra. Today’s magnet schools do operate somewhat the same way, but many times students are not just accepted based on their academic skills any more. There are different ways to get into a magnet school. The school in Fairbanks accepts students by lottery every year. In the lower 48, students may be accepted according to their district with a few slots on reserve for other students. Why magnet school over regular public school? Magnet schools offer multi-age class rooms for the children to learn from each other. They also offer smaller class rooms which gives the teacher more time with each individual student. Barnette Magnet School “loops” their teachers so the children will have the same teacher at least two years in a row. The current set up at Barnette has the children in their core classroom for the morning session where the teacher teaches the basics of math and literature and writing to the students. For this portion, they are all in the same grade. After lunch, the children branch off into “exploration classes” that the student and parent chose at the end of the previous school year. These explorations range from art, science, music, history, and physical education. The school’s set up is for the success of the student. Every teacher has the child’s best interest at heart and goes above and beyond for their students. In the magnet school, there is more parent and teacher interaction as well.

The “No Child Left Behind Act” has put pressure on public schools to work with the children in raising their grades. More should be done though. There are many children out in the community that are bright and would succeed but either do not fit in the cookie cutter shape the school district expects them to be in or it is the lack of parental participation at home. Transitioning all the K-8 grade schools into magnets school would make an immense difference in the community and provide greater opportunities for students. If each elementary and middle school where to become magnet schools, there would be room for each child currently attending school. The magnet school would accept children by district with a few slots for children who would like to choose a different school. Bus routes would not be disrupted because children would stay within their district. One other benefit of transitioning to magnet schools would be the easier transition into high school. Students would be used to having more than one teacher which would ease part of the stress of being a freshman. One concern might be the question of what type of magnet school each one would be. I feel that the public school system could follow in the footsteps of the University of Alaska Fairbanks and keep the science theme alive throughout the school district as well.

No school system is ever perfect because of our ever changing society. However, changing our current public schools into magnet schools would give each child a better opportunity for a brighter future. Each child could have a better learning experience based on their needs and be able to learn in an environment that current public schools are unable to provide. Teacher would also be able to use their talents to teach other classes during the exploration time which would keep the teachers from growing stagnant by teaching the same subject everyday.

Swift Essay

I believe that Jonathan Swift’s goal with this essay was to completely shock the people first and then give his proposal. He was frustrated over many things in Ireland at the time. He was mostly frustrated with how the poor were treated. The landlords did not care that their tenants had not worked and did not care that they had no money for rent. This would put the women out on the streets to beg for a few pennies to help with the rent. Jonathan became tired of the women beggars on the streets because he felt that the poor should be taken care of and given a chance to be part of working society. His article is crude and harsh. For that time period, it was extremely offensive. The message of the article is direct and to the point. I do believe that this satire is very effective. He uses intense sarcasm to draw the reader in and offend them and then the end of the article twists into his proposal. I don’t think that this essay is overly persuasive. There really is no persuasion until the very end of the essay. Even then, it is very well written and hard to tell that it is persuasive. Again very effective though because it makes the person want to protect the poor little babies! The target audience would have been adults. I would assume that for this time, men were more targeted than women and in this case I believe the landowners were the main targets. The landowners would not agree with this article because that would entail them having a heart and caring about their tenants and Ireland really had problems with this because the English had taken over much of the land. Probably a lot of Jonathan’s frustrations were towards the English as well. I’m sure that the response for this article was not well received at all. Jonathan and his family probably had to be very careful after publication though he probably would have been well received among the poor.

Mandatory Organ Donation

So the solution is to make organ donation automatic unless you opt out. I like it. I think it is effective. Those that are adverse to organ donation can fill out a form to decline. In reading this article, I also thought of those who might come from a religious faith that does not believe in organ donation. I’m sure there is one out there somewhere. These people can also opt out of the program. By giving the option of opting out, this saves many legal battles later on from people who do not want to participate. Coming from someone who has gone through kidney problems and almost lost one, I think this solution is really great. I know that I would have been very low on a long list to receive a donated kidney. With this program, I might have had a much better chance of receiving one. I think the person did a great job of showing both sides of the issue while maintaining their position. The target audience is all adults because organ donation can affect everyone. I don’t think that everyone will agree with this even though the writer has proposed an opt out option for those who are adverse to it. I do believe that the solution provided is good enough to satisfy both sides of the position. The writer gives a lot of statistics and facts which is good because the reader can then make a very educated decision as to whether they agree with this writer or disagree. I’m not sure if the solution of mandatory organ donation would work. I think this would cause a lot of problems. I am not opposed to it but I think many others would be and I can see how some could see this as an infringement on their rights. So I really think that the opt out program is the best solution.

Run On Sentences

So I don't want to brag, but I know that I don't write run on sentences. I have a hard time making a clear statement like that because there is a first for everything and maybe I have written a run on sentence that I am unaware of. Generally speaking, I do not write run on sentences. To me, a run on sentence is just the omission of a period, a comma, or a semi-colon. I said in my last blog about comma splices that I am very direct in my writing. This means that I am probably too direct for run on sentences as well. I like my sentences to be short and too the point.

Research Draft 1

Imagine the scene in “Waterworld” where Kevin Costner’s character urinates in a contraption that then distills the water. He pours the water into a plant which then provides drinkable water for him. Sure, there was a collective “Ewwww!” worldwide during that scene because of the gross factor; but was that idea so far fetched? Everyday, water is wasted through baths, showers, doing the dishes and flushing the toilet. But what if that water could be treated and reused? In the world, there is about one percent of water available for drinking. That same water is not just used for drinking; it is also used for all household functions. Recycling water is not new in nature, but has come to the forefront again as countries are re-evaluating their water needs. While some countries already participate in water recycling, other countries are unsure about trying it because the thought of drinking waste water is unappealing. “Wastewater has been treated to a level that is fit for drinking, consumers, especially the public, do not have a complete understanding of the treatment techniques for reusing waste water and find these ‘toilet to tap’ projects unacceptable.” Unfortunately the environment is in a tailspin towards global warming, so every effort should be made towards recycling. Although initially expensive to create and still somewhat controversial, water treatment facilities are important because they recycle already used water, save millions of gallons each day, and protect the environment from further harm.

There are at least two different types of treatment facilities. In the most common type of facility, the wastewater goes through a series of vats in the chemical process until at last it comes out clean. The water is tested before being sent out for reuse. The more the water is going to come into contact with a person, the more chemically treated it is to prevent sickness and disease from affecting any individual. A newer type of treatment facility is a man made “natural wetland”. Gravel and rock are put down with dirt. The waste water is placed on top and plants that are chosen because they help out the environment are planted. As the soil begins to break down, water trickles into pipes laid in the ground. The plants help by breaking down the waste quicker through sunlight and the natural oxygen they produce. Integrated Water Systems in North Carolina uses the natural technique when creating their water treatment facilities. They say that their facilities are “designed for nature by nature”. (Integrated water systems, 2007) This means that they have designed their systems around nature’s model. The chemical process is the most popular process to use, but people are starting to realize that recycling naturally is not only better for the environment but it is the natural process. The earth already recycles water naturally, so we should as well. Both of these water treatment processes only send out water to be used for watering lawns, washing cars, and anything else that could use non-potable water. This treated water is not used for drinking water. Besides those two major treatment facilities, there are now at home water treatment units that can be installed to recycle what is called “grey water”. Grey water is washing machine, dishwasher, and shower water. Pipes can be re-routed to go to this unit so that the water can be treated and reused. One example of grey water reuse is the Melbourne Linen Services in Australia. This linen company was given a grant to pay for their AquaRecycle Laundry Water Recycling System. Water that the launderer uses will be sent through this system to recycle over 80 percent of their water usage. According to the Ecos article, “Melbourne Linen Services…will reduce its potable water consumption by approximately 50 million liters per year – an 80 percent decrease”. (Ecos, 2007)

With an ongoing drought in several countries including America, the idea of saving water is becoming more attractive not only to residents but also to lawmakers and politicians. Right now Denver, Colorado is struggling to integrate a new system in which to recycle waste water. The price tag for a new system is right around one billion dollars, however, they expect to welcome another three million people into the state within the next five years. In order to meet future water needs, they need to make a decision now regarding their water use. With installing a new system, they hope to double the amount of treated water they currently use.(Rocky Mountain News, 2007) Cheyenne, Wyoming uses their treated water to water the parks. They estimate that they save over one million gallons of water each day by using treated water. (Local News 8, 2007) Australia is at the forefront of the debate right now as two cities fight over whether they really want to drink recycled water. The politicians are ready to implement the 68 million dollar facility to treat the water but residents are not ready yet. They are unsure about the idea of drinking purified wastewater or as science.org put it, “thinking that the water in the glass in your hand might have started off in someone’s toilet bowl”. (Nova – Science.org.au, 2007) San Jose, California is already looking ahead to the future by thinking of recycling sewer water into drinking water. While that is still a future dream, they are working on a recycling center to open in November. “The Orange County Water District will inaugurate in November a plant that will recycle up to 70 million gallons of waste water a day.” (News Fuze, 2007)

In the United States, many states are under a drought alert causing many places to have a water ration. Georgia is the state that is making the news lately. According to the Tampa Tribune, “Lake Lanier in North Georgia supplies drinking water for metro Atlanta’s 4 million residents”. (TBO, 2007) Lake Lanier is way below normal levels and although the Army Corp of engineers says that there is no emergency, the governor says there is. He is fighting with the state of Florida and the state of Alabama to stop water drainage to their states in hopes of preserving the water for Georgia. The water drainage from the lake helps many things such as endangered species or the seafood industry in Florida. (TBO, 2007) Many of the counties are now under very strict water rations and there is speculation that the lake only has about three months of water left for consumption. One of the reasons why Georgia is hurting so badly is because they never put a water conservation plan into place. Now that the worst has happened, there is a struggle to scramble and find a way to quickly conserve what should have been taken care of a long time ago. (Bluestein, 2007) If Georgia would put into place a good water recycling system, they would not be in the mess they are in right now. They would not be struggling with water rations and fines against people who use too much of their water.

With only approximately one percent of water available for consumption on the earth, measures should be taken to protect our environment. (Integrated water systems, 2007) We should look at the environment as a legacy for our children. If we don’t take care of it now, then what is left for our children? With global warming as a huge threat in the future and our water supply slowly dwindling as glaciers continue to melt at an ever-quickening pace; we need to turn towards water recycling as a means for protecting not only the environment but our water supplies as well. The rapid decline of glaciers and drying riverbeds should be a clue and a wake up call that global warming is here and water recycling will keep the global warming at bay. According to an article in the Wall Street Journal, “Mr. Roberts estimates that 1.1 Billion people world-wide lack access to clean drinking water.” (Wall Street Journal 120)

When thinking of recycling, one does not readily think of water conservation. In fact, it would probably be last on the list with paper, glass, and aluminum first. (epa, 2007) However, water is very important to a healthy environment and planet. Without water, our planet cannot survive. It is important to put up with the expense of saving water now, than spending more in the future trying to save what was lost. We should quit being selfish and start thinking about our children and even grandchildren’s future. What legacy are we leaving them? Are we leaving them a beautiful environment or a desert wasteland? There are so many different environmental benefits in water recycling such as giving an additional source of water with out depleting what little we have left, it helps our ecosystem and keeps balance, it also helps prevent pollution. (epa, 2007) With so many benefits to water recycling, more people should get on board and do their part to recycle. Even saving the smallest drop of water is huge and could ultimately be the drop that saves the planet.

References

Clayton, S. (2007). Desalination: OPTION OR DISTRACTION? Ecos. 138, 33. Retrieved on October 11, 2007 from Ebsco Host.

Grey Water Central (2007) Retrieved October 11, 2007 from http://www.oasisdesign.net

Integrated Water Strategies (2007) Retrieved October 11, 2007 from http://waterrecycling.com

Water Recycling and Reuse: The Environmental Benefits, Region 9: Water Program (2007) Retrieved September 36, 2007 from www.epa.gov

GE Water and Process Technologies (2007) Retrieved October 11, 2007 from http://www.gewater.com

Scott, J. (2007) Increase in Peninsula Bills Expected. Water Ways. Retrieved from http:// www.insidebayarea.com on September 26, 2007.

Kruszelnicki, K. (2006) Water Recycling. Great Moments in Science. Retrieved from http://www.abc.net.au on September 26, 2007.

Associated Press (2007) San Jose looks to turning sewage water indo drinking water. News Fuze. Retrieved from http://www.mercurynews.com on September 26, 2007.

Smith, J. (2007) Sticker shock: $1 billion for water. Rocky Mountain News. Retrieved from http://www.rockymountainnews.com on September 26, 2007.

Associated Press (2007) Water Recycling in Cheyenne Saves 1 Million Gallons a Day. Associated Press. Retrieved from http://www.localnews8.com on September 26, 2007.

Bluestein, G. (2007) Georgia has no plan for drought. Associated Press. Retrieved from http://www.decaturdaily.com/decaturdaily/news/071029/drought.shtml on October 31, 2007

Salinero, M. (2007) Georgia’s answer to drought riles neighboring governors. The Tampa Tribune. Retrieved from http://www2.tbo.com/content/2007/nov/01/na-georgias-answer-to-drought-riles-neighboring-go/?news-nationworld on October 31, 2007.

Membrane Technology. (2007) Rising demand for fresh water drives recycling systems market. Membrane Technology. Retrieved on October 19, 2007 from Ebsco Host.